Life After Divorce

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Preparing for life after divorce is never an easy experience for anyone. The process of adjusting to
your newly altered life can bring about complex emotions, thoughts, and feelings. Whether this
choice was filled with conflict or not, going through a divorce is rarely an easy task. Many
changes will occur, and adjusting to your newly altered life in a healthy manner will help when
you begin to reestablish yourself. Here are a few helpful ways you can prepare yourself for life
after your divorce.

 

Be Accepting of What Happened

For a significant amount of life after divorce, you may only feel negative emotions, leading
you to question if you’ll ever truly be happy again. This is a normal part of the process and you
should let yourself be emotional during this time. Holding onto these feelings can cause internal
conflict after a while. If you find yourself struggling to understand these emotions, consider
finding yourself a therapist. Allowing yourself to speak to a professional about the divorce and
your feelings toward it is a healthy way to cope without casting blame on either party involved.
You may find your thoughts becoming consumed with the details of why your marriage ended.
During this time, don’t hold onto the past by letting yourself question what could have been or
what should’ve been done differently. When you find yourself questioning various aspects of
your marriage, gently remind yourself why the divorce happened. Acceptance is not likely to
happen overnight, but it will help you tremendously when you begin to move forward with your
life.

Become Financially Independent

Regarding life after a divorce, there are several financial factors that will need to be
reconsidered; such as creating a new budget based on a sole income. For a certain time in your
life, you had a budget that was based on two incomes and now that you’ll be financially
independent, you’re going to have to alter your spending habits. It’s likely that you shared a joint
account with your spouse, but now that you’re separated it’s important to cancel these types of
accounts. Joint accounts that are not canceled after a divorce are likely to become a liability that
may cause you trouble in the future. If you have to relocate, it’s common for a newly divorced
person to move into an apartment or with a family member while they figure out their financial
situation. As you navigate your next step, there may be certain factors that push you to look into
purchasing a home, such as already having kids, needing your own space, or adopting a pet for
good companionship. When you begin house hunting, learn how to determine how much
mortgage you can afford. Since you’ll have a new financial budget, knowing how much you can
afford will help you narrow down homes that are within your price range. Preparing yourself for
the financial changes you’ll experience will create a greater sense of stability in the future.

Rediscover Who You Are

You’ve been living a blended lifestyle with your significant other, and now that you’re separated
you’ll have to rediscover yourself as a separate person. You may feel a loss of identity due to
the divorce. Stay patient as it will take time for you to feel like you’re living a somewhat normal
life again. During this time, embrace the freedom you have as an independent person. Consider
trying out different routines until you’re able to create a new routine for yourself to follow daily.
Because your previous lifestyle with your spouse can become busy, you may have lost contact
with some of your family and friends. Now that you have increased alone time, this is a great
opportunity to reach out to these individuals and rekindle a relationship with them. Rather than
wishing for your previous lifestyle back, take this time as an opportunity to find new interests
that you may have. The best way for you to move forward from your divorce is to establish
yourself within your new life.
Although your divorce is closing one chapter of your life, another one is beginning for you at the
same time. Life after divorce can have you feeling drained from all of the emotions you’re
experiencing, but it’s a great opportunity to rediscover yourself as an individual.

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