Benefits of Divorce Mediation For High Conflict Couples

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Benefits of divorce mediation-Many people believe that high-conflict couples are unfit for divorce mediation. That is a
widespread false assumption. In truth, a qualified mediator can proficiently assist many
individual relational dynamics. Mediation in divorce cases is always advised! Always! However,
it is advised, especially in high-conflict marriages where the family runs the risk of severe
financial ruin and emotional anguish due to a spouse prolonging the process and using the legal
system as an additional forum to abuse or dominate the other spouse. In reality, more and more
Superior Courts require mediation in every case before wasting the resources and time of the
courts with a trial. But there are also many other benefits of divorce mediation for high-conflict
couples that we would like to discuss. Therefore, if you are about to start your divorce, read on
to learn why you should use a mediator.

What are the signs of a high-conflict couple?

Conflictive divorces sometimes stem from communication breakdowns. For many, improving
communication can lead to more effective problem-solving. However, animosity can frequently
result in an increase in resentment and blame that destroys all chances of peaceful
conversation. Usually, a single perceived offense feeds more significant feelings of offense,
which can escalate into a full-fledged conflict loaded with resentment, rage, and spite. Financial
concerns and child custody are the two most challenging divorce topics.


Couple arguing

A high-conflict couple can also benefit from mediation during a divorce.

The role of the divorce mediator

An experienced, unbiased mediator meets with you and your spouse to go over and resolve the
difficulties in your divorce. You can complete your mediation online even though meetings are
typically held in a comfortable office setting. Mediation can help you and your spouse to come to
an agreement on the issues you need to resolve to finalize your divorce and there are many benefits of divorce mediation. For instance, this
method can be used to resolve issues with child custody, child support, and asset partition.
Instead of making decisions or offering legal advice, mediators serve as guides to help couples
decide what is best for their situation. Most mediators will prepare and even submit a divorce
settlement agreement to the court if the parties agree during mediation.

The benefits of divorce mediation for high-conflict couples

Finding an experienced attorney who can help you through the process is a smart first step to
exploring mediation since it has numerous advantages. Here are a few ways that the mediation
process might lessen the suffering and challenges of a divorce:
Mediation calms things down
The news that you intend to separate or get divorced will likely cause a high-conflict partner to
become extremely sensitive and reactive. Although such partners frequently threaten to divorce
themselves, it’s a trait of their personality. Therefore, they frequently don’t mean it when they
say it. But when you say it, it could make someone feel rejected, disrespected, or offended. But
if you go to mediation, the mediator can help maintain order, moderate contentious discussions,
meet separately or together, and concentrate on your particular case. In mediation, the
emphasis is on what needs to be done right away, as opposed to the he-said, she-said structure
typically used in court.
As a result, even in a high-conflict divorce, mediation is less likely to cause defensiveness for
either of you. The mediator can meet with each party individually, such as in different rooms or
on a virtual platform, so that the parties in some domestic abuse cases never have to see one

Partners that are divorcing but are still friends.

One of the benefits of mediation for high-conflict couples is that it helps them sit down and talk.

Better control over the situation Instead of letting a judge decide what will happen to you, your children, and your assets,
mediation essentially puts the future in your hands. No one knows your circumstance better
than you and your spouse. Therefore, you may control the outcome of your divorce on your
terms with mediation assistance.
Furthermore, judges frequently have a heavy caseload. That leaves them with little time to fully
evaluate each divorce brought before them. So, through mediation, you can dig deeper into the
problem and develop original solutions. For instance, couples may devise a special
arrangement through mediation to keep the family home until the children finish school. Or, the
children reside there, and the parents move in and out in rounds. In this case, one of the
parents might need to move long-distance in Florida, for example, so they might need to hire
professional movers. And it is a good idea when you have to deal with relocation during a
divorce to let experts make it stress-free, as you already have enough on your plate.

It is faster

High-conflict divorce cases frequently involve several distressing urgent issues that must be
resolved. For instance, who will move out, and who will live in the house for the time being? Or
settling child support to ensure both parents have enough money to live on, potential alimony to
help a spouse financially get on their feet, health insurance, and many other matters.
On the other hand, once you make an appointment, you can visit a mediator within a week or
two. Courts typically set hearing dates several weeks or even months in advance. Also, during
Covid, several courts have mostly been closed down, with few emergency hearings, while other
cases had long-term schedules. The partners can divorce more quickly and amicably if these
issues are dealt with a mediator right away.


Persons signing divorce papers.

If you chose mediation, your divorce might end faster than expected.

Mediation is cheaper

Another one of the benefits of divorce mediation for high-conflict couples is that it is cheaper. It’s
more likely that you’ll need a lawyer to assist you in getting the result you want if you file for
divorce before settling problems like child custody, child support, division of marital assets, and
alimony. Attorney expenses quickly add up when so many problems that need fixing. In
addition, those fees go up faster the more disputes there are.
At the same time, in most mediations, both partners cover the mediator’s fees. Therefore, there
is a good chance that you will pay significantly less than if you had gone to court, regardless of
whether the mediator is an attorney or another expert educated in mediation.
Mediation is better for the kids
Because it might be less tense than a disputed separation, mediating a divorce may be the best
choice for couples with children. Parents at odds with one another present a worse picture than
couples who mediate because they have to work together to find a peaceful resolution. Also,
mediation encourages joint custody arrangements that allow kids to maintain relationships with
both parents.

Final thoughts on the benefits of divorce mediation for high-
conflict couples

Even when the parties are cooperative, going through a divorce is never a pleasant experience.
No matter how difficult the divorce is, the breakdown of a marriage is an emotional challenge on
many levels. So, if you’re going through a divorce, it is better to enjoy the benefits of divorce
mediation for high-conflict couples and reduce conflict than to engage in long, unpleasant court

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