Freedom of Choice
Freedom of Choice
When conducting a mediation, the single most important thing is that the parties have the freedom to make their own decisions in a comfortable environment free of coercion. As mediators, we should abstain from passing judgment on our clients and instead merely serve as a guide in facilitating a resolution. Meaning, we should never stand as an obstacle to our client’s own self-determination.
What makes mediation so unique is that almost every other “professional” working in this field operates to shut down the parties’ freedom of choice-whether they intend to or not. These individuals make decisions according to what they think is best. Judges, Parent Coordinators, Guardian Ad Litems and more have decision-making authority based on their expert opinions. The actual parties to a divorce are silenced.
Even divorce attorneys are constantly trying to convince their clients to do what THEY think is best. Although attorneys are supposed to give their clients the final say, many times they will go to great lengths to persuade their clients to do something they might not feel comfortable doing therefore hindering their freedom.
And this is why mediation is truly magic. It is the one venue where you have the freedom to decide your future free of judgments, suggestions, and orders. Don’t you want a say in how your life will be shaped going forward? Shouldn’t the people with the most skin in the game be deciding how their own family will look?
It’s truly wonderful to be working in a field where we help families transition in a peaceful, intelligent, and self-sufficient manner. My mission is to get the word out that a majority of these decision-making middlemen are not necessary. Even in the most contentious of divorces, successful mediation is possible.