Reclaim Your Life Through Divorce Mediation
Reclaim your Life through divorce mediation. Divorce (noun): the legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body. – Oxford
dictionary. In reality, the definition merely grazes the surface. Divorce is a difficult, at times
traumatic experience that involuntarily invites myriad conscious and subconscious processes.
Emotionally charged (even when amicable), draining, hyper-stressful, and at times disorienting
for the party or parties involved. It comes with high emotion tide; anger, resentment, anxiety, and
fear. What once was a love of divine proportions now molds into something eerily earthly and
real. Divorce is but a deduction of an ethereal matter – and its last recognizable shape is one of a
bureaucratic affair. But life goes on, no? Once you sign the papers, life is yours to reclaim. This
is how to find inner strength through divorce mediation.
What is divorce mediation?
In legal terms – it’s a godsend and can help you reclaim your life. It surpasses the traditional divorce route and strives for a more
neutral, less finger-pointing kind of settlement. In general, divorce mediation is simply a process
that allows soon-not-to-be couples to resolve universal divorce-related issues through a neutral
third party. The mediator would typically meet with the divorcing couple in an informal setting
(i.e., their office, not court). Or in a more modern setting, such as virtual mediation. Regardless
of the preferred format, the unbiased mediator is there to help the parting parties articulate and
subsequently settle their issues. Divorce mediation aims to reach a settlement agreement to file
an “uncontested” divorce with the court.
How it works
The process is afoot the moment you and your marital partner agree to use this particular
alternative resolution method. So, in other words, mediation only works if both parties are
willing and open to discussing and negotiating the terms of legally parting ways. Divorce
mediation is voluntary, meaning the court cannot force a disagreeing spouse to engage in the
process. The next step would be finding a good mediator – and setting up the initial meeting.
During the meeting, both parties will present their case and articulate their expectations
regarding universal divorce-related issues, such as:
● child custody
● child support
● property division
● spousal support or alimony
There are no time restrictions in divorce mediation. Most couples reach a mutually satisfactory
agreement within a couple of sessions with the mediator.
Divorce mediation benefits
Traditional divorce litigation often proves to be a strenuous, lengthy process. Being highly
stressful, unpleasant, and demanding, mediation led by a neutral third party can significantly ease
post-marital turmoil. Can you find inner strength through divorce mediation? We think so. The
advantages are plenty. Here are some.
You hold the reins
Divorce is an intimate affair and should be approached accordingly. Rather than leaving it up to
external circumstances or even – the universe, taking matters into your own hands (and we’re
talking about “the rest of your life” here) is absolutely paramount. Traditional divorce litigations
rob us of having a say in what’s to be our future the moment we exit the courtroom; the future of
our children, assets, and, ultimately, our own being. Mediation offers a different solution – it
gifts you the reins. Only you and your spouse are in control. You determine the outcome and exit
the marriage on your terms. Think of it this way: traditional divorce is like shopping for suits at
Target – the offer is generic. However, mediation is very much like traveling to Italy and getting
your suit tailored by one of the greats. Divorce mediation offers creative, custom-made solutions.
Working in unison
Unlike the court’s hostile, resentment-fueled (and lengthy) process, divorce mediation
replenishes the relationship between the parting spouses. Even more, when there are children
involved. Many adolescents struggle with their parent’s divorce. Some even turn to substance
abuse to alleviate the impending change and all the unfamiliarity and estrangement that comes
with it. Subsequently, parents are left with no choice but to attend family therapy for addiction
treatment. The therapy will offer the support you need. However, it doesn’t resolve the core issue
– salvaging your familial dynamic for your child’s sake. Mediation can help. It can set the tone
for a more collaborative, supportive relationship and make for a strong, united co-parenting
Let’s approach the elephant in the room. Divorce is expensive. If you follow the traditional
route, it probably won’t be long before your attorney’s fees start to add up. At a tremendous
speed, at a that. The more arguments and issues emerge, the more of an eyesore the bill will be.
Simple as that. However, if you opt for mediation, your eyes will be just fine. In most cases, the
parties split the neutral party’s fee. Most mediation services charge a flat rate, typically costing
$4,000-$5,500. – far less than if you and your spouse had gone the traditional litigation way.
Besides being professional attorneys, mediators can also be psychologists or accountants,
professionally trained for the process. (attorney mediators charge more) Important to mention:
some divorcing couples will need to hire additional help with mediation:
● social worker: visitation and child custody-related issues
● appraiser: property division, the assessment process
● lawyer: some individuals find the self-representation role too demanding; in that case,
consider hiring a lawyer for mediation purposes
Is divorce mediation for me?
Mediation only works if you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse are on the same page. The success
of the mediation rides on the truthfulness of the following statements:
● you and your spouse agree on custody terms
● you agree to divorce
● there is no history of domestic violence
● you and your spouse are transparent about your finances
Can you find inner strength and reclaim your life through divorce mediation? – It won’t be easy,
but it’s definitely worth a try. If you don’t have to go to court – don’t. The first step to reclaiming
your life is gaining back control. And that’s what mediation does best.